Hi Reader,

I was at the lunch table, about to host a training, when the email came in. I asked my wife to open it for me because I didn’t know whether I had the capacity to take in what it said. It was the NO I had seen coming since the pitch, and still it hit me like a car.

The bid was for a leadership programme reaching 1,500 leaders a year at an existing client, and it meant either tripling the project size or losing it. My body went into shivers, tension and heaviness, and it didn’t care that my head had already worked it out. And then the voice started: “Next year is going to be very difficult. I’ve been too comfortable, relying on one big client.”

My coach taught me to celebrate every NO, because a stronger YES follows. So when the shock eased, I celebrated the biggest NO I’ve ever received with a day at the spa.

What I was celebrating had all happened before the NO.

For the first time, instead of preparing on my own, I brought my associates in. It made the whole process less lonely, and it pushed us to say out loud what we stand for: our values, how we work together, what makes learning, and so our training, meaningful for us. I gave the most authentic pitch I’ve ever given. One of my associates called it "bold". I had rehearsed, I finished on the minute, and I was proud of what we represented together.

During the Q&A and from the focus of the questions, I could feel that we had different philosophies about leadership training. And perhaps I was also too close. As an existing vendor, I knew what we had been delivering and may have assumed I understood what they wanted next.

I would have loved to learn all of this with a YES. The fear is still here, and I don’t know what comes next, or whether the bigger YES will be about money at all. Maybe the YES looks more like ease, or alignment. Last week, I brought the associates together for an All Hands. We put grief on the agenda and left the call with more energy and optimism than we came in with.

🎤 Waiting for you on the Unprofessionalism podcast:

𝐊𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐢𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭.

That’s David Pearl’s answer when I ask what unprofessional advice he would give the podcast audience.

The more serious the situation, the more we can feel obliged to show how seriously we’re taking it. Our voices change. We become solemn. A playful suggestion suddenly feels inappropriate.

But how often does making a conversation heavier help us deal with what’s difficult?

David suggests that lightness can help us see alternatives. When we’re under pressure to find a solution, there’s value in being able to entertain an idea that sounds ridiculous before deciding whether there’s something in it.

David has a speciality: ideas that sound ridiculous at first and then turn out to be rather brilliant, like agreeing to run a workshop for a cosmetics company only if everyone brought their mums. They agreed, and he brought his!

This episode felt like a pep talk for approaching the heavy things a little more playfully. Exactly what I need these days and maybe you, too.

🎧 Click here to listen to the interview

📥 Download my 1-page summary

​UP_038_Summary.pdf​

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👀 Watch the unedited interview on Youtube

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The big NO I received also means that my workshops.work team and I have room for new work in 2027. We design and deliver people skills training that helps people become better people to work with and for, across countries and in more than 10 languages. I’d love to hear from L&D teams looking for that kind of partner. Any introduction is very welcome.

I'll see you in two weeks!

Myriam